My Day #17 post for the Health Activist Writer’s Challenge month is about a lesson that I learned the hard way. There are many and I am going to share the one that came up for me when I asked myself that very question journaling this morning.
I knew it was time to go. I had been at my job for almost seven years when my position as the Director of Rehab was eliminated. In fact, the Friday before that fateful Monday morning I shared with my staff that if I was upper management it is what I would do. It was a good decision on their part… and though it was painful at the time, it was good for me, too. BUT, it didn’t have to happen that way.
Two years earlier I was becoming restless. I had accomplished my goals and was having a hard time staying engaged. A little voice inside was telling me that it was time to do something else but the job played well, I liked the people I was working and it was an easy commute. The truth was, though, that I was bored. In retrospect, that little voice was the voice of my soul. My creativity was being stifled and it was showing up in my work.
That experience was a big lesson for me. I am now paying more attention to groups that I am part of or boards that I serve on. If I find myself becoming disengaged or don’t feel like I am contributing 100 percent… it is time to move on even though I hate to disappoint others or deal with any conflicts due to a mis-directed sense of obligation. That is especially important as I manage the MS that has become part of my daily life. I have a finite amount of energy and I need to use it pursuing activities that nourish my soul and support my healing. After all, I really do know what is best for me.
I trust my inner wisdom has since been a daily mantra. It requires me to slow down and pay attention to what makes me feel good and what pulls me down. I trust my inner wisdom.